When Love Steals In 2/2

[lotusk]

•••-------•••


"So who are you seeing tomorrow?" Chanyeol asks as she meticulously paints Berrylicious Perfection onto each bare toenail. She's bent over her task, her striking, large eyes wrinkled in concentration. It’s Tuesday night and Joonmyun’s asked her to stay, to teach her how to put on makeup and how to talk to boys because Joonmyun can’t do either.

"Jongin says he's an Architecture student and his name is ... dammit, why can't I remember his name? I think it's Hyungseok? Or is it Minjae? I swear I've asked at least three times but it just won't stick. Anyway, Jongin says he's funny and nice and I'll definitely like him." Joonmyun's lying on her belly, her pillow tucked under her chin as she watches Chanyeol make meticulous brushstrokes that leave pretty frosted pink lakes in their wake.

"What I don't understand is why you're going through this whole blind date fiasco. I mean you and Jongin have obviously been flirting with each other for the past two years. That's a hella long time to have foreplay? I mean ... you should just date Jongin so y'all can sleep with each other and solve all your problems."

"CHANYEOL!" Joonmyun yells in shock and disbelief.

"Don't tell me you've never considered it? Honestly you're both hopeless. You're so obviously into each other that this whole blind date thing is just dumbassery. You need to date each other not people whose names you can't even remember."

"We're FRIENDS! He's just a dongsaeng!"

"You say that like you actually believe it," Chanyeol snorts. She stretches her legs out and spreads her toes apart so the polish can dry properly. Joonmyun sighs at how long and slender her best friend's legs are. Joonmyun's legs are slender too but there's no getting past the fact that she's as short as Chanyeol as tall.

"Of course I believe it. I'm just his friend's noona. A good friend and roommate. That's all."

"And what is he to you?"

"He's just a dongsaeng. Probably my favorite dongsaeng but a dongsaeng nonetheless."

"Is that all? Think hard, Kim Joonmyun. This is important."

"He's the person I feel most comfortable with ... other than you and Sehun."

"Think about why. And I don't think friendship is the answer here." Chanyeol's expression is as serious as Joonmyun's ever seen it and she's about to ask her to explain when they hear a loud knock on the door. It's Sehun.

"Is Jongin here? I need help with a Math tutorial."

"Just me here," Chanyeol gives Sehun a flirtatious smile and Joonmyun catches her brother trying his best to look cool and unaffected when he’s probably sporting a boner.

"Hey, Chanyeol. How've you been? You've um ... got a smudge on one of those nails."

"Damn," she bites her lower lip with a gentle curse and Joonmyun has to stop herself from rolling her eyes.

"Anyway, noona, if you see Jongin when he gets in can you tell him I need help?"

"You can text him, you lazy ass."

"I did! He's been out for hours and he hasn't replied any of his texts. Maybe he met someone?"

"Someone?"

"A girl. Maybe he met a girl he likes and they're having a drink together. Just saying. It's not like Jongin doesn't have girls asking him out all the time." Sehun is flippant and it grates on Joonmyun's nerves. What girls? And why hasn't anyone told her about them?

"It's funny how girls are always asking him out and yet he doesn't date," Chanyeol says speculatively.

"Well maybe he met someone today who's finally changed his mind," Sehun is practically smirking.

"It must be a special girl if he's not even answering his text messages. I mean,"

"He's probably studying at the library with his phone on silent!" Joonmyun says waspishly and the other two give her knowing stares.

Sometimes she really really hates Sehun and Chanyeol.




Chanyeol is drooling all over her bolster and Joonmyun looks at the wet patch in disgust. She's going to insist she brings her own bolster the next time she sleeps over because she doesn't need Chanyeol christening her bedding again.

She checks her phone but Jongin hasn't replied her messages let alone her calls. It's past 11 and she's worried. It's not like him to ignore calls and messages. Chanyeol's snores become increasingly loud, making it even more impossible for her to sleep and she's had a hard enough time trying in the past half hour. Feeling out of sorts about Jongin's absence, she leaves her room quietly and calls him again.

She hears strains of a song from another room and follows the sounds to their source. Jongin's door is ajar - all three of them usually leave their bedroom doors open when they're not busy or asleep so it's nothing out of the ordinary. Jongin's phone is buzzing and EXO's Don't Go is playing. It's her favorite song and she's always telling Jongin that, while he scoffs and counters that Thunder is a much better song.

She looks at the phone screen as the caller ID flashes on and off. Prettiest Noona it says and she laughs at the contact name, but there's a twist of sadness in her laugh. It's the cutest thing that he's actually saved her number that way in spite of the fact that he’s never actually called her noona in real life. It makes her smile but at the same time it makes her heart ache in the worst way that she must really be just a noona to him after all.




Leaving her door open a crack, Joonmyun curls into fetus position and snuggles under her quilt. She tries to nap, but between Chanyeol's less than delicate snores and her anxiety over Jongin, sleep eludes her completely. She really needs to know that Jongin is okay and she knows she won’t be getting any sleep until he’s back home, safe and sound.

Finally, around midnight, she hears the front door open and shut. Feet move across the floor quietly before stopping right in front of her door. She's about to scold him for not bringing his phone and scaring everyone (well her anyway, she doubts Sehun's even raised a heartbeat over this) half to death when he pushes the door open.

For reasons she can't fathom, Joonmyun shuts her eyes tightly and pretends to be asleep. Her quilt has wound itself around her waist with all her tossing and turning and she hopes all that disarray doesn't make it obvious that she hasn’t actually been sleeping. The mattress dips as Jongin sits beside her and slowly unwinds the mess of fabric, spreading it out smoothly over her, covering her from neck to toe.

"Goodnight, noona," Jongin whispers as he caresses her forehead. And then he's gone.

Inexplicably, a tear rolls down Joonmyun's cheek and it's another forty minutes before she finally surrenders to exhaustion.



•••-------•••


The only source of illumination in the room is the splash of light from the hallway but it’s enough. Joonmyun looks so ethereal in sleep, even with her sheets all bunched up around her waist. She’s so quiet tonight, Jongin thinks, unlike Chanyeol who’s snoring up a storm beside her. Carefully, he eases the quilt off her and tucks it neatly around her, shaking his head fondly at the Totoro pajamas she’s wearing tonight.

“Goodnight, noona.” His fingers brush her forehead longingly as he whispers goodnight, his heart breaking a little. He leaves her room quickly, whatever peace of mind he’d found earlier scattering like so much dust in the wind. After wandering around for hours, he’d actually managed to find some measure of serenity but now he’s back to being an unhappy tangle of conflicted emotions.

Why does it hurt so much?

Jongin wants to blame Sehun for everything. He wants to think that if his friend hadn't accused him of being in love with Joonmyun, he wouldn't have become so hyper aware of her, so caught up in her every word and gesture. The last three days have been torturous for him, seeing Joonmyun every day and trying to act as if nothing has changed when really, everything has - at least for him.

It had taken hours of soul searching but yesterday, Jongin had decided that he should be the good friend Joonmyun wants him to be and introduce her to someone she'll actually like and respect. Deep down, he’d known that Yixing wouldn't suit and that's why he'd picked him. But he can't continue to be selfish. Just because he can't have Joonmyun, it doesn't mean he should stand in the way of her meeting someone who could truly make her happy.

And so he’d finally decided on Kim Minseok for the next blind date. Minseok is an architecture student he's known for several years - an outgoing guy with a great sense of humor. Jongin’s always enjoyed his company and he believes Joonmyun will too, as soon as she gets past her initial shyness. He knows this instinctively.

He hasn't quite figured out how he'll cope with Joonmyun being happy with someone else, but he'll work it out when the time comes. He has to because they're roommates after all. And if turns out he can’t cope with Joonmyun being happy with other people, Jongin knows he may have to look at moving out even if it’s the last thing he wants.

Moving out … of Joonmyun’s apartment and her life.

When he thinks about not seeing Joonmyun wander around the apartment in her ridiculous Totoro pajamas with a jar of Nutella in one hand and a spoon in the other, or not watching tv on the couch with her head on his shoulder, or not hearing her burp and fart for hours after they polish off some beer and chicken, he can’t breathe. He feels winded, like the way he’d felt when Joonmyun had landed on him at the skating rink and he hadn’t been able to breathe for a second or two. He tries to imagine leaving her apartment and her life and … he just can’t do it.



•••-------•••


"What's his name again?" Joonmyun tucks a stray, curling lock of hair behind her ear and pushes her glasses further up her nose.

"Pay attention this time when I say it and for God's sake memorize the name! We wouldn't want you calling him Joongki oppa by mistake," Jongin rolls his eyes.

"But Joongki is sooooooo handsome!" Joonmyun sighs dreamily, well and truly star struck by the charismatic actor who plays Gu Yongha in Sungkyunkwan Scandal.

"He probably looks like nothing much outside of a dress," Jongin grumbles.

"Jongin, this jealousy has to stop. Okay, what is blind date guy's name? I promise this will be the last time I ask. I promise!"

"His name is Minseok. MIN-SEOK. I swear to God it's not that hard to remember, Joonmyun. MIN-SEOK."

"Unnecessari-"

"-ly sarcastic, I know." Jongin grins and she hits him on the arm ... just before his phone rings. It's Minseok, the screen lighting up aggressively. A few seconds later, Jongin is telling her Minseok won’t be able to make it tonight because he’s been involved in a minor accident - just a fender bender so it's nothing to worry about but it will take them at least an hour to sort out the insurance claims etcetera.

"Poor guy," she shakes her head sympathetically.

"Do you want to go home?"

"No! I mean we’re here already and I've never actually had a chance to watch a movie at the City Film Festival. We should stay, Jongin. Plus, I've got my thickest scarf to keep my neck warm and toasty and I'm already dressed for it anyway." She reaches her hand out and gives Jongin’s a squeeze. He smiles and it’s almost like the smiles he usually gives her. Joonmyun has missed Jongin’s easy smiles because he’s been quiet and a little distant this week.

She wonders if it’s because of the collision they’d had on the ice. Every time she replays the scene in her mind, she feels all knotted up and funny inside. Jongin’s lips had been so close to hers and all she’d wanted to do was lean in and taste him, taste his skin. She’d been so tempted … but then she’d remembered just in time that he was her dongsaeng and he might not have welcomed a kiss from his friend’s noona. So she’d reeled in her urges and scrambled off him.

Now she almost regrets not kissing him. Perhaps tonight if there’s if there’s a chance at all …? But no, I couldn’t.

“Let’s sit here.” Jongin spreads out a tartan blanket and they sink to the ground in tandem. There’s an ocean of blankets and people surrounding them and it’s all very festive as people chat and eat snacks and drink beverages from thermos flasks. Joonmyun’s brought some green tea and she decants it into steel cups (because she always complains that paper cups just pollute the planet), passing one to Jongin.

A movie screen has been set up on the lip of a large clearing in Blue Lantern Park and it’s framed by the rapidly darkening, bruised purple sky and the silhouettes of pine trees. In the distance, there’s a small river that weaves and meanders slowly around the park, and the floodlights are casting golden shadows on the water. The light bounces prettily off the surface and it looks like there a million fireflies floating over the water.

“The water’s so beautiful.”

“Like fireflies.” Jongin blows on his green tea, delicate wisps of steam drifting over his face. He sees fireflies too, Joonmyun thinks as she stares at him. Their knees are up and just touching and her eyes keep wandering to his profile. He looks so different from Baekhyun – all golden skin and square jaw and generous mouth. What would it be like to feel his face beneath her fingertips? Something warm settles in her tummy at the thought, and it doesn’t feel at all like green tea.

The movie, a 2006 romantic comedy called Penelope, is a sweet love story but she just can’t concentrate because Jongin’s aftershave is too distracting, the arm looped loosely over her shoulders too heavy and the warm chest under her cheek too comfortable. And he smells wonderful. He always does but somehow everything is more distinct tonight and it’s making her yearn for things she shouldn’t be yearning for.

Sparks. She feels sparks and if she’s honest with herself, this isn’t anywhere near the first time she’s felt them.

She needs some air so she can think, so she won’t do anything rash and she moves out of Jongin’s field of gravity and reclines on the blanket.

"Are you okay?" Jongin's voice is laced with concern and maybe something else; Joonmyun just can't figure out what.

"My back hurts. I just need to lie down for a while." She tries to smile.

"Do you want me to massage it?"

"NO!" Joonmyun yells with a little more force than necessary. He gives her an odd look before lying quietly on the ground beside her. His intoxicating scent wraps itself around her senses and Joonmyun feels like she's drowning.

"Joonmyun?"

She doesn't have to look at Jongin to feel the weight of his stare, feel it mark indelible imprints on her soul.

"Yeah?" She finally turns and their eyes meet in the semi-darkness, the pallid grey shadows from the screen painting Jongin's face a dull, sickly color.

"Do you ever feel like just telling someone how you feel about them even if they'll probably laugh at you?" Yes, Joonmyun whispers in her head and she closes her eyes, movie forgotten as Jongin threads his fingers through hers.

"Sometimes."

"What if I told you …" Jongin begins and then falters, "Never mind. It's not that important after all."

Joonmyun would normally pester him until the secrets spilled from his lips but this time she's wary of asking, too afraid of what he'll say. So she says nothing and mutters a silent apology to Christina Ricci and James McAvoy because it’s not their fault she can’t focus on the movie for longer than two minutes at a time. Her small hand cradled securely in Jongin’s much larger hand, she spends most of the next one and a half hours staring at the starlit canopy that is the night sky, and stealing looks at Jongin rather than keeping her eyes on the unconventional romance unfolding on the screen before them.



•••-------•••

They catch a taxi home, tumbling into the back seat together in their impatience to get out of the cold. Inside, it’s warm and Joonmyun’s cranberry scent, the one Jongin had helped her pick during the previous weekend’s shopping trip, is curling its tendrils around him. It’s a real effort keeping his hands by his sides when all he wants to do is take her in his arms and kiss her.

They usually chat about nothing in particular when they ride in buses, trains and taxis together, but today they’re both quiet. It’s a silence that’s both okay and not-okay and it worries Jongin a little. He wants Joonmyun to use his shoulder as a pillow like she usually does, but at the same time, he’s scared of what he’ll do if her cheek actually finds its usual resting place. Damn that cranberry scent and more than anything else, damn his stupid hopeful heart (for wanting what it cannot have).

When they’re about two blocks from home, Joonmyun asks if they can get off. She wants to stretch her legs after all that sitting down in the park, and she’s been craving the double chocolate praline ice-cream at Benny’s. Jongin nods gratefully because he needs to get out of the confined space before he ends up doing something he regrets. But first, he stares out the window at the traffic and people rushing past, desperately trying to gather some threads of calm while Joonmyun tells the taxi driver to let them off.

“Why do you always take French vanilla?” Joonmyun takes a lick of her double chocolate praline ice-cream, her ballet pumps making muffled footfalls on the sidewalk.

“The same reason you always take double chocolate praline, I guess? French vanilla is safe and I know it works for me. If I choose a flavour I haven’t tried before, I might end up with something I can’t take.”

“But it’s good to take risks sometimes, Jongin.”

“But risks sometimes don’t pay off and things get messed up.” Jongin feels like they aren’t talking about ice-cream anymore. And he’s so intent on watching her lips form words and on watching her tongue lick her ice-cream that he doesn’t realize he’s eating his own ice-cream too slowly until he feels melted vanilla trickle down his chin. When Joonmyun tells him to stop moving, Jongin comes to a stop without hesitation and she drags him to the side so they aren’t blocking other pedestrians.

“Don’t move, Jongin! You eat ice-cream like a child,” she laughs as her index fingertip wipes away errant drops of vanilla from off his chin. And the next part happens so fast, Jongin doesn’t even have time to rein in his impulses. One moment Joonmyun is licking vanilla ice-cream off her finger and the next moment, she’s standing on tiptoe and holding Jongin’s face between her palms.

“Joonmyun, wh-“

And there’s no chance to say anything else as soft lips fit over his and Joonmyun’s tongue sweeps gently into his mouth. She tastes of double chocolate praline and something more elusive (Jongin suspects it’s Joonmyun) and it’s the sweetest thing Jongin has ever tasted. His ice-cream joins the other one on the sidewalk as his arms reach around her tiny frame and hold her close, their tongues entwining sweetly together.

Inhale, Jongin tells himself just before his tongue fills her mouth and he deepens the kiss, his left hand cupping her nape as he feels her small hands gripping his waist. Finally, remembering where they are, Jongin drags his mouth away and places a chaste kiss to her forehead before pulling her into a tight embrace, lifting her feet clear off the ground. Her laugh is a beautiful sound as she tells Jongin to put her down. Breathing in her scent, Jongin hugs her tightly and he knows he’ll never let her go, not unless she makes him.

"I thought you said I was just family,"

"I thought you were ... until I found out you weren't. Are you ... are you ok with that?"

"Yes, Joonmyun. I think I kinda made it clear that I am ok with that," Jongin smiles and his mouth swoops on hers to steal a kiss.

“There’s no need for sarcasm!”

“Sarcasm is always necessary.”

"Of course it’s not!” Joonmyun glares before asking a little self-consciously, “So … am I just your noona?" Joonmyun rests her fingers on his cheek.

"It took me a while to figure it out but no, you're not just a noona."

"Not just the prettiest noona, you mean?" Joonmyun teases.

"Oh man, you saw that thing on phone? That's so embarrassing." He groans and buries his head in her shoulder.

"I was looking for you, okay? I called your phone and heard it ringing. I was worried, Jongin. You shit!" She punches his arm with as much strength as she can muster.

"Ouch! I'm sorry, noona. I just needed time to sort things out in my head."

"Don't you noona me! Not after all this time. Anyway, I’m not sure I want you calling me noona anymore – not that you’d even called me noona once before tonight. Where were you anyway? I've been meaning to ask you all day but the time just hasn't been right for it."

"I was walking around mostly. Trying to work out what to do if Minseok and you had hit it off tonight. Thinking about whether I would have the strength to move out.”

“YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MOVE OUT!”

“Well, I know that now.” He chuckles and they exchange another chocolate-vanilla-tinted kiss as cars honk in the distance and people walk by.

“Okay, I think we’ve given everyone here enough of a show. Let’s go home,” Joonmyun tugs him along … sighing happily when his arm drapes around her shoulders like they’ve always done. But tonight is so much more than they’ve always done as she wraps her arm around his waist and he drops kisses on her hair and forehead as they walk the rest of the way home.

It's bliss.



•••-------•••


They’d come home all giddy and in love and had somehow managed to shower and get ready for bed like they normally did. The only thing they did differently was to stand at the bathroom sink together, brushing their teeth like little kids at a sleepover (except no one had to go home in the morning).

Now, they’re in Joonmyun’s bed in their pajamas, lying on their sides facing each other, just talking and giving each other sweet, lazy kisses.

“Do you really think I would have liked Hyungseok? Or was it Minjae?”

“Joonmyun, please. His name is Minseok! Just as well you guys didn’t meet since you seem terminally incapable of remembering his name. And yeah, I really think you would have liked him. He’s a fun guy with a kind heart. I think you guys would have hit it off.”

“Well, you can always introduce us,” she says cheekily.

“That’s not funny, Joonmyun.” Jongin drags his index finger over her chin.

“You can introduce us because I know for sure there won’t be any sparks.”

“You didn’t have any sparks with me either.”

“Not … entirely true.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean I think I’ve been attracted to you for a long time. I just refused to admit it to myself. Especially with you being a dongsaeng and all that.”

“But we’re only two years apart. That’s nothing.”

“You should have asked me out earlier then.” Joonmyun reasons, poking him in the ribs.

“I was in denial too, I guess? Sehun called me out on it last Sunday and I’ve been in a perpetual state of torment since. Because there I was, finally admitting to my feelings and the girl I like is asking me to set her up on blind dates.”

“You should have set yourself up as my blind date, you dumbass.”

“I think I would have resorted to that eventually. But what about Byun Baekhyun?”

“Ah, I guess we need to talk about him sooner or later. I mean I confided in you for most of that relationship – all the problems we were having. The only thing I didn’t discuss with you was the fact that I didn’t want to sleep with him because I just couldn’t see myself … doing that with him. I just couldn’t. But I did like him a lot? Or maybe it was just the idea of being with someone that appealed to me and it wasn’t Baekhyun himself that I liked quite so much.”

“You kind of told me he broke things off with you because you didn’t want to sleep with him.”

“When did I do that? I don’t remember ever telling you that.”

“It was the night you had too much soju after jjambong and you insisted on telling me even though I told you it wasn’t a good idea to be sharing secrets when you were drunk.”

"Why didn't you stop me?!"

"I tried! You insisted you were sober and you pinned my hands to the table so I couldn't cover your mouth."

“Why am I so embarrassing?!” Joonmyun practically wails before asking, “Did I mention that he called me uptight?”

“Yes. And I told you that you’re not uptight.”

“But-“

“You’re NOT.” Jongin says firmly, just before he captures her lips and tightens his arm around her body.

“But I’m so attracted to you. In fact, I think I love you? I mean I've always loved you as a friend but this ... thing we have now isn't the same at all is it? And I want you so much but I’m not ready to sleep with you yet. I really want to but I’m scared too. Doesn’t that make me a little uptight?”

“No, it just makes you Joonmyun. And we have plenty of time. Let’s just take things slow and get used to each other first.”

“You’re not upset?”

“No! I'm just happy we're here now. Together. Now kiss me and let’s get some sleep. I didn’t sleep much last night and I’m exhausted.”

“Yeah, same. Thanks for coming in to check on me when you got home.”

“Wait, you knew?’

“Yes,” Joonmyun smiles shyly and kisses Jongin, “I think I might actually love you.”

“I know I love you,” Jongin smiles back and then they fall asleep, spooning … and this could really be the happiest Joonmyun has ever been.



•••-------•••


They're woken up the next morning by the insistent ringing of Jongin's phone on the bedside table. It's Fall Out Boy's Centuries so it can only be Kim Minseok. Jongin groans, his forearm pressed to his forehead.

"Who is it?" Joonmyun asks blearily, clinging to him sleepily.

"Minseok. I should answer that."

"No, don't!" She rolls on top of him before she has a chance to think about the consequences. "Just let it ring. He'll leave a message," she laces her fingers in his and presses down on his palms so his hands can't go anywhere. The phone finally stops ringing and a few seconds later a message comes in. Reaching over him, she retrieves the phone and passes it to Jongin.

"He wants to reschedule the blind date," Jongin laughs. "What do I say?"

"Tell him there's no need. I've already got a date. A permanent one."

"Yeah?" His lazy smile and the laugh lines that form around his eyes make her breath catch in the most painful way.

"Yeah," she smiles, snuggling closer and that's when she feels it. "Jongin?"

"Um ... morning wood issues. You might want to get off me now, Joonmyun." He sounds calm but his features are clearly strained.

"What if I'm comfortable where I am? What if I don't want to move?" Joonmyun's nipples have formed stiff peaks from the friction with Jongin's chest and the layers of cotton separating them don't seem to be doing anything to inhibit her natural response to having him beneath her.

"You'd better get off me, Kim Joonmyun, I mean it." A note of desperation has entered his voice and Joonmyun feels a slight twitching beneath her and an answering slow burn and dampness between her legs.

"I don't think I can," Joonmyun says as she moves experimentally. Her crotch rubs against his hard length, the deep ache intensifying.

"Joonmyun, please." Jongin shuts his eyes, his hands settling on her lower back.

"Make me feel beautiful, Jongin." And there's something familiar about those words, like she's said them before.

"You're the most beautiful person I know," Jongin's words and his eyes are full of sincerity Joonmyun knows she'll never let him go. Not unless he wants her to. "You're the most beautiful person, Joonmyun and you don't need to have sex with me to prove that you're beautiful."

"I know. And I'm not quite ready yet but this feels good?" And she rocks against him and it feels so amazing, especially when Jongin rotates his hips slowly and moves with her. He doesn’t remove her pajama top but his hands reach beneath the fabric to touch her breasts, play with them. His fingertips pinch the erect nubs gently, and her back arches from the pleasure he brings her.

Joonmyun grinds her hips again and again, and that unbearable need builds, growing more and more intense until clenching, shuddering spasms overwhelm her. She lets out one final gasp of ecstasy before she collapses on him, all her senses raw and tingling as Jongin rides out his own orgasm.

"Are you okay?" Jongin asks eventually, when he's caught his breath.

"So much more than okay," she nestles against his chest, the still too-fast rhythm of his heartbeat echoing in her ears.

"I'm glad." Jongin's hand strokes her hair. "You'll always be beautiful to me, Joonmyun."

"I'm starting to believe it," she grins, "but I think the next time, we should do this without any clothes on. I don't want you ruining another pair of pants because of me."

And the quiet of the morning is broken by the sounds of Jongin's delighted, husky laughter.



Three weeks later


“You need to get a new quilt.”

“Why the heck would I need to get a new one? This one’s perfectly fine!’

“I’m okay with you being under this Totoro quilt, and I know you’re okay with you being under this Totoro quilt but I’m not sure how I feel about being under this Totoro quilt.”

“Please? It’s Totoro. I need him in my bed, or I can’t sleep. I’ve always had a Totoro quilt, ever since I was nine. This is non-negotiable!”

“It’s non-negotiable, is it?” Jongin’s smile is seductive and sly as he wraps his arms around hers and nuzzles her neck, and rubs his morning stubble against her soft skin, sending tingles across her skin that leave her nipples erect and a tightness forming low in her gut.

“100% not up for discussion.”

“Are you sure about that?” Jongin asks just before his tongue circles one nipple and his mouth engulfs it, his teeth tugging at it gently. Joonmyun gasps at the sensations, her palms holding Jongin’s head as he teases her nipples. Joonmyun’s always been self-conscious about her too-small breasts but Jongin doesn’t seem to mind and he’s always made her feel so beautiful as his warm hands cup the gentle slopes and his mouth slides over the tips, sucking gently on taut, pale pink nipples.
“Totoro stays!”

“Are you sure?” Jongin dusts her belly with kisses before his mouth moves further south … and stops. “Totoro goes if you want me to continue.”

“That’s blackmail, Kim Jongin!”

“You can call it what you want,” he grins as he gives a teasing lick that ignites such intense desire she feels like she might die if he doesn’t finish what he’s started.

“Okay fine, fine! Totoro goes!” Joonmyun agrees desperately and then she hears a murmured good just before she feels Jongin’s wicked tongue move over her. A loud moan escapes her mouth before she can muffle it and then she’s too overwhelmed by the wet, tight sensations to care. It doesn’t take much to unravel her entirely and then there’s the rustling of a foil packet and Jongin kisses her neck and collarbones and then her mouth as he sinks into her, filling her up completely. His hands cup her breasts and he gives her nipples all the attention they need as he moves inside her and Joonmyun wants him to never stop.

She moans as he thrusts into her over and over, his mouth moving hotly over the sensitive skin on her neck. “The most beautiful noona,” Jongin whispers before taking her earlobe between his teeth, and plunging into her depths yet again. Her legs wrap around his back as she pushes her hips up to meet his driving thrusts. Then it’s Jongin’s turn to moan as they move in unison, faster and faster and faster until they reach the edge of the precipice and white hot heat sears them both as they climax together.

They barely have time to settle into each other’s arms, whisper I love yous and come down from their joint high before they hear a distinct noise of disapproval from outside the room they share.

“YOU GUYS ARE SO GROSS, MAN!” Sehun yells disgustedly through the bedroom door and Joonmyun and Jongin burst into laughter.

“GO AWAY SEHUNNIE!” Joonmyun yells back.

“SO GROSS, I CANNOT!”

“At least he didn’t interrupt us earlier?” Jongin chuckles against her skin and it’s ticklish.

“He shouldn’t have said anything at all. Now I’m going to feel awkward every time I see him for the next few days. Ugh, I hate that boy,” she growls. “And it’s not like he and Chanyeol are going to be super quiet when they finally hook up.”

“But how do you know they will?”

“Because Chanyeol wants my brother and unlike me, she’s not shy. Trust me, Jongin, he doesn’t have a hope of withstanding Park Chanyeol.”

“I’m sure he doesn’t. Should I warn him? Male solidarity against noonas and all that,” he grins before yelping when Joonmyun pinches him on the arm. “I was joking, Joonmyun!”

“What’s wrong with noonas?!”

“Nothing. I wouldn’t give up my noona for anything.” And this time Jongin’s expression is serious as he gathers her in his arms and says, “I love you, Joonmyun.” Then he’s kissing her and Joonmyun surrenders to his persuasive kisses with a soft, happy sigh.




Three months later


Joonmyun exhales in relief; her meeting with the thesis supervisor had gone much better than she’d expected and there are only very minimal rewrites to do. She walks past the sign that says Electrical Engineering Department, her manuscript tucked securely under her arm.

Her long, black hair tumbles down her shoulders and back in relaxed waves and it’s a style that flatters her heart-shaped face. Some days she wears glasses and other days she wears lenses – today just happens to be the latter. She’s wearing white skinny jeans with a wine red brioche knit sweater which clings subtly to her petite frame. Her clothes are more casual than trendy, and that’s just how Joonmyun prefers it.

“Joonmyun!” A familiar male voice calls out her name from across the corridor and she wrinkles her nose in distaste. She hasn’t heard that voice in four months and she’d just as soon never hear it again. But this is something that needs to be done so she pastes a fake smile on her face before turning on her heel. It would be so much easier to just walk away but that would smell too much like defeat. She doesn’t want Byun Baekhyun to go around with the misconception that he has the ability to upset her – because he honestly doesn’t.

“Baekhyun. Hello.” She checks out his appearance dispassionately and can’t help comparing it unfavourably to a much taller and broader frame, tanned honey skin, a square jaw and sensual lips.

“How have you been, Joonmyun?” His eyes appraise her from head to toe and Joonmyun thinks she sees interested approval in his face.

“Good, I’ve been good,” she nods quietly.

“It must have been three months since I saw you last. You look different - your hair and your clothes. You look fantastic!”

“Thank you.”

“We should catch up soon, Joonmyun. Maybe over some coffee?”

“Ah, thanks for the offer but I've given up coffee. I never liked it much anyway, Baekhyun, which you'd know if you'd ever cared what I thought about anything. I've moved on to tea and I find it suits me much better.”

“But-“

“I’ve got to get going now.” She gives him a jaunty wave and heads confidently towards the main door of the Engineering Building. Picturing Byun Baekhyun spluttering at being blown off, she can barely contain the smirk. She’s almost at the foyer of the building when her phone buzzes: I’m here, noona :)

That brat, Joonmyun frowns. When she’d actually wanted him to call her noona in the past, he’d always refused. But now that she no longer wants him to, he calls her noona any chance he gets. Her handsomest dongsaeng, she grins (even handsomer than Song Joongki although she'll never tell him so. His head would swell so big if he ever even suspected.).

They’d agreed to meet outside the Engineering building at 3 p.m. and her feet speed up even though it’s only 2.56 p.m. Joonmyun already misses her boyfriend; it’s been seven hours since he nuzzled her neck and gave her a good morning kiss on the cheek. “See you this afternoon, Joonmyun. Love you,” he’d said as he’d tucked the Totoro quilt under her chin before leaving for lectures.

For all his teasing months ago, Jongin hadn’t made Joonmyun give up her Totoro quilt. In fact he’d bought a king sized one so they wouldn’t have to fight over the covers in the middle of the night. He’d practically moved into her room the night they first kissed (Chanyeol had taken over his old room two weeks later) and Joonmyun thinks he’s the best roommate ever and it’s just a bonus that he never drools on her bolster.

She’s about to walk through the glass door when an arm encircles her waist and pulls her into an affectionate hug. “Jongin!” She laughs as she snuggles into his embrace. She’d expected him to be waiting outside for her but this is so much better, she thinks, as she melts into his arms.

Jongin likes surprising her and she hopes he never stops …



A/N: Many thanks to Bunny who offered to beta this even though I finished the fic so late. To all my girls who kept me focused and listened to me whine: Jenni, Cass, Shanti & Ansa, I love y’all so much! Finally, a note of appreciation for two of my favorite noona romance kdramas, which were invaluable sources of inspiration: The Woman Who Still Wanted to Marry and King of High School.